Our journey into entrepreneurship can often feel lonely. We may lack connections with people who understand us or miss out on useful feedback, leading to doubts and questions about our abilities. Istiana Bestari knows all of this well. As a young entrepreneur, Istiana experienced the struggles of working alone first-hand. She's persisted through long hours and plenty of stress, balancing multiple jobs while navigating the uncertain waters of the creative industry. But Istiana didn't simply fixate on her pain points; she turned them into points of connection with others. Together with her partner, Rachel Wong, Istiana co-founded Monday Girl, a supportive network for women facing similar career challenges. Through the network, they took their personal experiences and created a space for mutual support and understanding, essentially becoming users of their own service. In this episode, Istiana shares her journey as a co-founder, how she changed her networking approach, and how she handled stress during tough times. She discusses her periods of loneliness, how she found her community through sharing her experiences, and why it's so important for women to connect and collaborate on their professional journey.
Our journey into entrepreneurship can often feel lonely. We may lack connections with people who understand us or miss out on useful feedback, leading to doubts and questions about our abilities. Istiana Bestari knows all of this well.
As a young entrepreneur, Istiana experienced the struggles of working alone first-hand. She's persisted through long hours and plenty of stress, balancing multiple jobs while navigating the uncertain waters of the creative industry. But Istiana didn't simply fixate on her pain points; she turned them into points of connection with others.
Together with her partner, Rachel Wong, Istiana co-founded Monday Girl, a supportive network for women facing similar career challenges. Through the network, they took their personal experiences and created a space for mutual support and understanding, essentially becoming users of their own service.
In this episode, Istiana shares her journey as a co-founder, how she changed her networking approach, and how she handled stress during tough times. She discusses her periods of loneliness, how she found her community through sharing her experiences, and why it's so important for women to connect and collaborate on their professional journey.
Learn more about Monday Girl.
In this episode, we cover:
Quote of the Week:
“I think humans need community...if you find people that make you feel safe, challenge you, and want to see you win...that is life-changing." - Istiana Bestari
Hosted by Katherin Vasilopoulos. Made by Cansulta and Ethan Lee.
Music by © Chris Zabriskie, published by You've Been a Wonderful Laugh Track (ASCAP).
Songs used in this episode include: "Air Hockey Saloon," "Oxygen Garden," "Mario Bava Sleeps In a Little Later Than He Expected To," "What True Self? Feels Bogus, Let's Watch Jason X," "Let Your Enemies Feel the Weight of Your Burdens," "I Am Running a Marathon with Thousands of Other Highly Qualified People Who Are All Trying to Defeat Me," "Short Song 021423," "Out of the Skies, Under the Earth,"
Used under the Creative Commons 4.0 International License
[00:00:00] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Hi, I'm Katherin Vasilopoulos. Starting my own venture wasn't easy.
After a decade working in the corporate world, I realized that so many things were out of my control, like layoffs and changes in direction. I didn't like the instability. I didn't want that to define my whole career and professional story, and so I left. I started my own company and achieved more than I ever imagined.
Now I'm on a mission to share stories from extraordinary entrepreneurs who are changing the world and who never gave up on their vision.
Entrepreneurship isn't for everyone. The journey can be lonely. It can be tough to find others who click with you on a deeper level. And working outside of a corporate environment almost always means fewer opportunities for meaningful feedback, which can cause self-doubt to creep in over time.
Istiana Bestari knows all of this. Diving into entrepreneurship at a young age, Istiana has plenty of experience navigating the isolation of entrepreneurial life. She has worked tirelessly for long periods, once even juggling five jobs to make ends meet. All while navigating precarious jobs in the creative industries without the support of a community transforming her pain points into points of connection.
Istiana co-founded Monday Girl, a network of women facing similar professional challenges. Istiana and co-founder Rachel Wong used their personal journeys as a blueprint, and they not only fostered a supportive community, they essentially became customers of their own service. In her role as a co-founder, Istiana has tackled the unexpected dynamics of leadership, redefined her approach to networking, and managed stress during times of intense overwhelm.
She talks about how she navigated through periods of loneliness, how she ultimately found her tribe by sharing these experiences with others, and why finding a space to connect and collaborate with other women is such a crucial step towards finding professional fulfillment.
Hello Istiana. Nice to meet you, and thank you so much for being here today.
Really appreciate it.
[00:02:19] Istiana Bestari: Hi. Thank you so much for having me.
[00:02:21] Katherin Vasilopoulos: You are a really special guest because you come with an interesting business model and a business past. Tell us about your background and also tell us about your current endeavor called Monday Girl.
[00:02:35] Istiana Bestari: I'll start with where I'm at right now. I'm the co-founder of Monday Girl, Canada's largest private network and members club for professional women.
We connect women to mentors, career support, and a community. I went to school for music. I studied pop music. It was a very small program. I thought I would be working in a studio and writing songs, and after I graduated I had no idea what I was gonna do with my life. And I met my partner and co-founder Rachel Wong.
We bonded over the fact that, you know, it was so hard to get your foot in the door. How do you meet new people? How do you get started? I remember attending so many networking events and reaching out to people on LinkedIn. No one got back to me, which was really discouraging, and we bonded over this mutual frustration with networking and we decided to start Monday Girl.
Pretty much the first day that we met and we hosted a brunch with our friends and invited their friends to come, and what started as a, you know, a small 50 person brunch people ended up walking away from that brunch, landing new jobs and getting new connections that led them to their next opportunities.
While this was going on, I was a multi-side hustler. I had many different things going on. I was running a YouTube channel. I was vlogging, traveling. I'm doing my music still. I was also, a videographer working with clients such as like a hair extension company. So lots of different things and eventually I finally found my one main path, and that's what led me to where I'm at right now, which is totally focused on Monday Girl.
[00:03:59] Katherin Vasilopoulos: We've all been in networking events where we don't jive with anyone or it doesn't feel right, or it's not the right crowd, and you walk away feeling alone. What do people tell you when they finish one of your events and they walk away?
[00:04:13] Istiana Bestari: You know, it's really cool cuz women will come by themselves and you know, it can be really intimidating and nerve-wracking to go to an event by yourself.
When you don't know anyone, you don't know what to expect. But I think a lot of women leave feeling relieved and they walk away meeting like 3 to 10 different new women. They have, you know, exchanged Instagram handles and you just feel like a breath of fresh air and like, people are trying to find people that they can ask questions to look for advice like other entrepreneurs, if they're an entrepreneur themselves or if they're looking to pivot career paths.
I think that a lot of women feel like so happy that they found us because they're so used to networking experiences that are just utterly uncomfortable, exhausting, and very transactional feeling, and this just feels like something totally different and it's something that you can actually look forward to.
[00:05:00] Katherin Vasilopoulos: I love what you're saying there because it happens where we have to put on a mask when we go out and meet people, and we are business people and we have to show that we're always competent and responsible and everything else, but we also have to be true to ourselves and say, well, you know, I'm still a person behind all this and I should be able to show who I am.
Tell me a little bit about whether or not you've ever experienced that, where you're just like, oh, I need to pretend to be something that I'm not, and this makes me feel alienated or alone even.
[00:05:32] Istiana Bestari: I've definitely gone through that many times before, you know, in high school, you know, I never felt like comfortable enough to show up as myself.
Even in university and many, of course, events when you're walking into rooms and you don't know what to expect or you don't know, especially for a lot of, oh, I would say 50% of our members identify as women of color, myself included. You walk into companies or events and you might be the only person that looks like you.
[00:05:58] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Do you remember any particular examples when you walked in and you felt like, okay, I'm, I know I'm different here and what do I do?
[00:06:04] Istiana Bestari: I very much come from a creative world entrepreneur, world freelancers, side hustlers. So whenever I walk into a room, even still today, that is more, I guess say corporate or the 9 to 5 world, I would walk into those rooms and you know, people would be in suits and stuff, and I'd very much be like, I don't feel comfortable here.
I don't know the language and things like that. So times, like, that I have and still do feel a little bit like nervous and you know, I just have a different background, different experience, different skillset.
[00:06:33] Katherin Vasilopoulos: What do you do to calm down or to relieve the anxiety? Or is it just there all the time?
[00:06:38] Istiana Bestari: Oh no, this has been very much a work in progress, but I do have a few things that I will always do.
You know, I'm constantly doing public speaking and that is very much has never been my comfort zone, like in high school and in university, I was very quiet. I was very shy. I didn't speak much. So obviously it takes practice and just repetition. You just get the reps in and it becomes more comfortable. So I would force myself to go to those events, you know, multiple times every month or a couple times a week just to keep going and practice it.
I also, I'm one of those people that I love doing affirmations. So every time, even still today, if I have, like, a big speaking gig, I'll look in the mirror and I have sort of a few affirmations that help me kind of get in the zone and feel comfortable and confident in the moments where I do get nervous.
Cuz that definitely still happens. Still, like whether I'm on stage or something like that, I really try to focus on the sensation of my feet on the ground.
[00:07:32] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Mm-hmm.
[00:07:33] Istiana Bestari: And it just kind of takes yourself sort of outside of your head for a moment and gets you back into your body and just like you remember where you are, it just like grounds you and it calms me down.
Little things like that. I also have like a lucky watch that I wear anything to do, just to feel your best, feel confident. And also if you are introverted, which I definitely am, um, making sure that before you walk into these, you know, really big social situations to be rested, maybe listen to music before you go, like just to feel your best self and come with your best energy.
All of those things really help.
[00:08:07] Katherin Vasilopoulos: That's good. Putting yourself in the right mindset, not just walking in cold and bringing in all of the energy from the day into this room.
[00:08:13] Istiana Bestari: Yes, cuz I've definitely done that where I'd rushed to an event and I didn't do my sort of like routine and it did not go well. So having sort of like a grounding routine is really helpful.
[00:08:22] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah. Like a mental prep just to get yourself in the zone.
[00:08:25] Istiana Bestari: Yeah.
[00:08:26] Katherin Vasilopoulos: What kind of a affirmations do you tell yourself? Can you, can you share that with us?
[00:08:31] Istiana Bestari: My favorite, like one phrase that I will always say to myself is like, for this, whatever it is, I am calm, confident, and collected. That one really helps me just like stay clearheaded and, and just calms me down.
And then whatever, I kind of change the words depending on what I'm walking into, whether it's a speaking gig or-
[00:08:52] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Mm-hmm.
[00:08:52] Istiana Bestari: -Whatever it is.
[00:08:54] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Mine is, and don't laugh. I love you. You're doing great. Keep working hard. You're gonna be okay.
[00:09:01] Istiana Bestari: Oh, I love that.
[00:09:02] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Can you tell me a little bit about an event that maybe didn't go well for you and other than you not being prepared mentally, but what had happened exactly?
[00:09:09] Istiana Bestari: I, as a former like musician, like I didn't even realize how nervous I would be. So I've had moments where I have walked on stage and I literally froze. I felt like I couldn't breathe. I could not get words out, like my throat locked up and I, I was like, do I run off stage? Like, what do I do? Just absolutely frozen.
And even for one of our biggest first events, um, Monday Girl, we hosted a sold out 250 guest event. And I had to do like opening remarks.
[00:09:36] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Hmm.
[00:09:36] Istiana Bestari: And I just got up there and I had notes in front of me. Like I had the script. I knew what I was supposed to say and do, but same thing, froze. Couldn't get words out. I could like not read the pages.
I just was like, oh my gosh. So those moments were not very fun, but I got through them and I now, I am so much more comfortable and confident, and even now I, especially when I do like my grounding exercises and things like that, I actually really enjoy now, you know, speaking and teaching and connecting with an audience and community.
You're just sharing value and you have something to say and believing that, and yeah, it becomes, it's actually really fun now.
[00:10:11] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah.
It's this repetition now you've kind of done it a few times and you're used to it. Well, it sounds like you're a very creative person and a lot of entrepreneurs are, and they're not trained to be business people from the get-go.
They have an idea, they have creativity, and they have a lot of energy that they wanna put into their projects. Do you feel that there's a precariousness to being a creative as an entrepreneur?
[00:10:34] Istiana Bestari: Yes, absolutely. It's not for everyone. You have to have a certain level of, I guess, risk tolerance. And, uh, I'm in a very privileged position where I don't have, you know, children, for example, relying on me or things like that.
Cuz if you're a freelancer or you have a, if you're a business owner or many side hustles, like you don't always have a very consistent, stable income. And a lot of clients will pay you 90 business days, not even counting weekends right later. So you often, you're waiting for a long time to see your paychecks and things like that.
And also like it takes a long time to build things like, you know, a really engaged, strong community. We started Monday Girl over five years ago. It hasn't happened overnight. It's been a very organic slow and steady sort of build. You don't know what's gonna happen and anything can change anytime and kind of being okay with that is key.
[00:11:24] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah.
Riding the wave. You don't know. It's uncertain, but you just have to keep hanging on. What kind of emotional shifts have you had to make from going from a very creative musical background to now running a business?
[00:11:38] Istiana Bestari: I think that when you're running a business, you're doing many different things and some of those things that you're doing are the things that you love doing, fuel you and are in your wheelhouse and you're really good at and energize you.
And then a lot of those things also you're gonna have to do, you're maybe not so good at or they drain your energy, they're not so fun, you're, they're not your favorite things to do. I'm really lucky that I do have a co-founder and we really balance each other out. Emotionally, it's been, every entrepreneur can definitely relate to this.
Like, the burnout is real. You're working long hours, you're constantly worried are things gonna break?
[00:12:10] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Mm-hmm.
[00:12:10] Istiana Bestari: Like, and when you stop, you know, everything stops. So a lot, there's a lot of weight and responsibility that you feel on your shoulders. So a lot of anxiety.
[00:12:18] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah.
[00:12:18] Istiana Bestari: I'll tell you, and the highs are high, the down, the lows are low.
All of that is so true.
[00:12:28] Katherin Vasilopoulos: What does burnout and anxiety look like for you? Like what do you experience?
[00:12:32] Istiana Bestari: It was for me, my most important thing and everything else didn't matter as much to me as this is probably my like deep underlying seeded fear of honestly like leaving this earth. What am I gonna leave behind? Like, I want to spend my time here and do something that matters and makes impact.
I always felt like if I'm not working or if I'm not working on this, then I'm, you know, wasting time or you know, I'm not being productive. But then eventually you get to a point where you do reach the burnout and your mental health is so bad. It's like you realize to do that mission that you wanna accomplish or to leave that impact, whatever it is, you have to take care of yourself first to be able to deliver that impact.
So, you feel guilty when you're resting and things like that, but you just have to remind yourself like, no, your best work comes when you are feeling your best self. So I recently just kind of came out of a really rough patch of burnout. It had been like our busiest season. We hosted our summit in last April, and it was, a very tight turnaround.
We planned it in two months only.
[00:13:37] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Oh my gosh.
[00:13:38] Istiana Bestari: But it, it was a huge success. It was, you know, definitely one of our highest, most proudest achievements in moments. It was at the Four Seasons, we had like amazing speakers full room. But yeah, during that time, like for the past, I guess I'd say five to six months, I was very, every single day I felt like I couldn't stop or take a break.
And sometimes you will have to go through those periods. It's not gonna be every single day, but for different stages of what you're doing, especially if you have a goal and people relying on you, sometimes there are moments where you just have to put in the work and hustle. Your mental health will definitely suffer and you will have to work weekends and nights and never get a break.
But then, like right now, I have a very balanced schedule. I feel like I'm energized and I feel like on top of everything and I feel like a lot more in control. And it's been a journey of like kind of back and forth of those two stages. And I think that's just the nature of when you do run your own business.
[00:14:37] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Do you, um, do you ever feel isolated?
[00:14:41] Istiana Bestari: Yes, for sure. Especially in the beginning years, I didn't have many other entrepreneurs around me. I was very much surrounded by like influencers and creators, and it's a totally different side to business. So in the whole, like I'd say first three and a half years of working on Monday girl, we didn't have particular mentors or leaders that we could look up to. I definitely wish that I had, you know, someone who had gone through a similar path as me or was an entrepreneur that I could turn to as a mentor and ask like, what should we do about this? Or how would you approach this situation?
I'm sure we would've, you know, avoided many mistakes if we had that guidance. Now I definitely feel like because of Monday Girl, my network has expanded exponentially, and I have, you know, a lot more access to so many amazing people that are on different paths, and have been through it for decisions.
Now Rachel and I go to, we have sort of have like a group of people that we will all turn to and ask like, what is your experience like, just getting insight and their perspectives. But ultimately when we do make a decision now, it's still at the end of the day with all that considered, like now we really go with our gut and what we really want rather than what other people want or suggest, but it has been very isolating sort of in the beginning, and also feeling like I didn't see very many people kind of doing a similar path as me. You know, my friends would have, you know, 9 to 5 jobs or other people would be just doing one thing, one niche or focus on one thing.
And I was, you know, kind of all over the place with five things on the go. And I was like, is anyone else out there like struggling with this and, like, can't figure out what to do or what to focus on? And it's just all over the place. So, yeah.
[00:16:21] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah. Because you have all these talents and you wanna explore all of them and you even wanna monetize some of them and turn them into your career.
What made you decide on Monday Girl and not any of those other things?
[00:16:33] Istiana Bestari: That was a really hard year. I think I, it took me like eight months-ish to kind of figure out, I wanna focus on this and this is the one thing that I wanna do. Cuz at that time I was doing my YouTube channel. I was traveling, I was working with clients, music, five things on the go, and I saw paths with all of them.
But you know, I'm only one person. There's only so much time. This was also during a time where I feel like hustle culture was still very much a thing. Going as fast as you can, achieve as much as possible before you're 30 kind of thing. Like I felt the pressure, even though no one was saying that to me. I just like internally had that pressure, but I realized like I felt like I was moving and all those five different things at a glacial pace or not as fast as that I could be if I focused on one thing.
It was a really hard decision. I was like, which direction do I go? I don't wanna let go of all of them. I'm passionate about all of them. So I made lots of pros and cons lists. I talked to a lot of my friends and family. I went back and forth and then eventually I came. To the decision where I realized Monday Girl is like, this is something, there's something special here.
There is so much potential for this and there's so much need for this. I'm really passionate about the problem of how inaccessible, transactional, awkward, like, painful, all of these things, like there's so much wrong with the traditional ways of networking. There's so much to be done here and I think that I can have the most impact here.
I can add the most value to, I guess, the world in this sort of field with Monday Girl at this time in my life. So I made the decision to fully focus on it, and I stopped doing a lot of the other things, which was definitely hard. You don't wanna limit yourself. We're humans. We don't wanna be. In one box, but for me it was definitely the right decision, at least in this moment in my life.
And I can definitely return to those things later on in life.
[00:18:19] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yes.
[00:18:19] Istiana Bestari: And now I realize like I have so much to look forward to. I don't have to get everything done by a certain age or whatever.
[00:18:24] Katherin Vasilopoulos: As you're talking, I'm, I'm hearing a juxtaposition. On the one hand, you're a pioneer in this kind of field because you're going, is anyone else doing this?
Is anyone else crafting this kind of company? But at the same time, you are comparing yourself to other people who are going faster than you. It must have been difficult to get, to be in that position because you're watching other people be in the hustle culture trying to go faster with more things. And then on the other hand, you're like, yeah, but I'm also trying to do something on my own.
That to me, is also a place of loneliness in isolation because you're, you're trying to compare yourself, but then you can't compare yourself. So did you feel any, any kind of pull in, in, in that respect?
[00:19:05] Istiana Bestari: Yeah, I think that we've really seen a gap. Like there, we don't see anyone that is serving young women and really addressing the, the networking problem of like, this is such a necessary thing.
Like everyone needs to have a network. Like, this is how you find jobs. You know, 80% of jobs are filled through networking. This is how you find your next opportunity and also, people who have a supportive network are three times more likely to get a better job. Um, it was very much like us figuring it out along the way, and a lot of it was also just serving ourselves because we, ourselves are the reason why we started this.
We wanted to make the platform and the community that we wish we had. We wanted to create the tools and network that we ourselves wanted, which kind of made it easier to figure out like, what is the right decisions? What are the things that we should offer, what should we go for? It was just like, what do I want?
Because if I want it, then I'm sure that other people out there want it to. So that also helped. Yeah.
[00:19:59] Katherin Vasilopoulos: What do you want?
[00:20:00] Istiana Bestari: A lot of things, but I think most importantly, just a supportive community. I think humans need community, like just genuine connection and a support system.
[00:20:08] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Mm-hmm.
[00:20:09] Istiana Bestari: Again, going back to like, if you find people that make you feel safe, challenge you and wanna see you win and wanna celebrate your wins with you. Like, that is life changing. That can change so much for you. It can give you the confidence to go for that job that you are afraid to apply for or maybe make you quit your job and start that business. Like all of those things, uh, when you have that network, so much can change for you and click into place.
[00:20:36] Katherin Vasilopoulos: How have you grown since 2018 emotionally, internally? What has changed for you from being the younger girl to now being this amazing businesswoman?
[00:20:46] Istiana Bestari: At that time I was very active on social media as a YouTuber content creator. I posted a lot and at sometimes I'll go back and look at my videos and I'll definitely cringe and I'll look at my old photos and I feel like I do not relate at all to that person.
Like I, it's a totally different person in my mind. I'm like, I have no idea who you are. I've definitely changed in so many ways. Like, I've gone through a lot more things. I realized it's okay to say no, to stand up for yourself, you don't have to do everything. And just kind of figuring out what is most important to me.
Yeah. So there's been a lot of growth and I think that just comes with going through stuff and finding your people. Also, finding the right people that kind of bring the best out of you.
[00:21:29] Katherin Vasilopoulos: And when you say no, you learn how to say no, that kind of dissolves that person that you were before. The people pleaser, because people pleasers say yes.
They say yes to everything. And to everybody. And learning how to say no, it's not a bad thing. It just redefines your own boundaries and it redefines your direction. So that's a huge growth right there. It actually saves you from making decisions that are not authentic to you.
[00:21:55] Istiana Bestari: Especially when there are definitely opportunities that will come your way and still come your way, and you're like, that would be so cool, or like, that's so awesome.
But what I have learned to do when deciding to take something on or say yes or no to something is asking myself a question. Does this serve my mission? Like my main goal or my main mission of what I'm trying to do, that goes for like Monday Girl. Does this serve the mission of what Monday Girl's trying to accomplish?
If it's a distraction, even though it might be a really cool opportunity, that's kind of what I use to determine yes or no. And maybe it does serve the purpose, but I just have too much going on and you kind of have to prioritize and say, which one is the one that will make the bigger impact? And before it would just be like, this is a cool opportunity.
I should take it. I a hundred percent should do it. Otherwise I'm gonna miss out a lot of FOMO. Operating with your like values and your North Star and your mission has been really helpful to kind of figure out.
[00:22:45] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah.
[00:22:46] Istiana Bestari: How to say no.
[00:22:47] Katherin Vasilopoulos: And you also mentioned before that many times you make decisions based on your gut.
You and your co-founder have done that many times. What does that look like going from your gut?
[00:22:57] Istiana Bestari: I think that as women, they say that like, you know, women are often more, you know, in touch or intuitive, and I think that there's been so many times where we've learned our lessons, where we felt it in our bodies.
Like, this was not the right either decision or this person is not someone that we vibe with or like, working with this person is, is just not gonna work. It's not a good partnership or it's not a not good fit. We wanted to make everyone happy. We wanted to, you know, not step on toes or cause conflict, but now after having kind of learned that, that at the end of the day, Even like if it's a person that isn't a best fit to work with, like it's not even serving them if you say yes to working with them, cuz it's not gonna be like your best work or your best energy. Like, if there's a mismatch, it's not even in their best interest for you to say yes and work with them and that's okay.
Like not everyone and not everything is gonna be a good fit.
[00:23:49] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Mm-hmm.
[00:23:50] Istiana Bestari: It shouldn't be anyways because there's only so much time in the day and there's only so many things that really are worth it. And then when you pick the right things, like things compound and just moves in such a different way than if you're struggling to push forward with something that's just like not jiving.
[00:24:05] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah, I hear you. Do you think that as a creative, you're more intuitive let's say than other people who are just purely from the business world, or entrepreneurs at the core?
[00:24:15] Istiana Bestari: Oh, yes. I think I've had to really learn to use data and like more logical thinking in decisions, but also at the same time there's a balance with intuition and trusting your gut.
And then data, of course. Yeah. As a creative, I think, and I guess as like, I'd always operate on like feelings and emotions and like, is this the vibe? Yes? No? That's kind of how I figured out like what I wanted to do. Just by like the energy that it gave me or didn't give me, I guess as a creative, that's how I operated for a long time.
[00:24:46] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah. What do you see for yourself, um, in the next few years? Where, where is this going and do you think you'll be able to use some of those other skills that you've set aside?
[00:24:56] Istiana Bestari: With Monday girl, we'd love to expand. You know, we have members all across Canada, which is amazing, from Vancouver to Halifax. But we'd, we'd love to keep expanding across North America.
So eventually, you know, uh, opening up in the US we've been playing around with different ideas such as maybe opening up like a Monday Girl flagship. We have lots of exciting kind of things we wanna try and events. We wanna host and speakers that we wanna book for Monday Girl. And then I guess personally in my life, like right now, this is my focus.
This is the right decision for me. But also I've had to kind of figure out, like I can't tie myself into just one specific thing, like your identity, I think a lot of entrepreneurs struggle with, like separating your identity with your business. I will probably eventually kind of start going back to the things that I was passionate about or adding new things.
Trying new things, whether it's music again, or writing or art or whatever it is. I think that I will figure it out as I go and bump into things and try new things, and I'm really excited about that.
[00:25:55] Katherin Vasilopoulos: I wanna know what you think about that. The idea of entrepreneurs not being able to separate their identity from their business.
Do you feel that at this point, and do you see other people going through that?
[00:26:07] Istiana Bestari: Oh, yes. I think it's really hard to not take things personally, whether it's like feedback or comments from trolls or on social media or if there's any ever a moment that is like maybe negative towards your business, like it's really hard to not take it personally or customer service, all those things.
And I've had to learn to separate it. Not only just realizing like it's never about me, it's not a personal thing at all. Even for our business, like not every single person is right for Monday Girl, and that is okay. Like we shouldn't be right for everyone. We shouldn't be serving every single type of person.
That doesn't work. You have to serve like the right type of person, so, I've had to learn both those two lessons and it's still work in progress. So I've had to set boundaries with things like not looking at feedback for a certain amount of time after like, an event has happened. Like, I know I am still emotionally like attached to this thing.
So I'll take like two weeks before I can, you know, be in a, the right mindset to take feedback constructively, doing things like that. It's not that I don't want to hear the feedback or I don't wanna get better or improve, it's just, there are right times and mindsets that you can or have to be in to take advantage of those moments.
[00:27:20] Katherin Vasilopoulos: And to be receptive to the feedback, cuz immediately after an event, I'm sure it's still raw and anything that's being said, especially the negative stuff, I imagine could be very hurtful or wounding because you've put in so much of yourself into these events.
And that's why I think a lot of people do think that their personal identity is completely intertwined with their professional identity. It's who they are. They've put in their whole blood, sweat and tears into everything they're doing, and so that becomes them. And then you have to come to a moment where, where you're like, uh oh, this is not all me.
I have to detach. There's a professional and there's a personal, but then some people might disagree with that. And say, no, it's you, your whole thing. Especially people who, if their name is their brand, if they themselves are branding themselves as the product or the service or whatever it is, then that becomes even more difficult.
[00:28:09] Istiana Bestari: Absolutely. Yeah. I couldn't agree more. It's if you're spending so much of your day and time and you're constantly focused on one thing, it's really hard to remember that there are other sides of you or other parts of you.
[00:28:20] Katherin Vasilopoulos: Yeah, that's why they say, it's important for you to develop at least one other social thing to don't be in your business all the time.
I mean, it's a suggestion, but you know, to do something else.
[00:28:29] Istiana Bestari: Yeah.
[00:28:29] Katherin Vasilopoulos: To remember that there's life outside of your laptop. There's life outside of everything that you're doing to keep your business, uh, alive. Is there any advice that you could give to someone who's starting off a business, uh, or someone who is interested in developing something but they're just on the fence and they're not sure how to start or when to start?
[00:28:49] Istiana Bestari: I would recommend when you're first starting out to test your ideas. So even for us, when we're testing out new ideas, we still will trial and test out ideas just to have like a case study to figure out if this works. So if that's you, like you could be, you know, asking ten of your friends to try your product or doing surveys, like test as much as possible until you can collect that data and feedback and reiterate your product or whatever you're doing, your service.
And then, the other thing I would suggest and always recommend for you're gonna be an entrepreneur, is just to be really solution oriented and be willing to figure anything out. Because every single day there will be a fire. There will be something that you had don't know the answer to, you don't know how to figure out, but everything is figureoutable, YouTube, Google, asking people has been like, we've managed to figure out almost, you know, all, everything that we've been through. We had no background in literally everything that we do. We did not go to school for this. Like, no one was telling us how to, giving us a guide. It was all trial and error and just figure it out. So be willing to get scrappy.
Pull up your sleeves, be resourceful, and you'll be fine.
[00:30:04] Katherin Vasilopoulos: I'd like to thank Istiana for sharing her story with us. You can learn more about Monday Girl in the episode description. As we discussed, finding a supportive community is essential to your success as an entrepreneur. If you know someone who's struggling to find a community of their own, we would love it if you shared this episode with them.
And So, She Left is made by Cansulta and Ethan Lee. We'll be back next Wednesday with a new episode. Our music is by Chris Zabriskie, edited for your enjoyment. You can find a list of all the songs you heard here in the episode notes. I'm Katherin Vasilopoulos, and thanks for listening.